People who tell me, “You've had a haircut!” What, do they think someone knocked me unconscious, dragged me to the barber's shop and arranged a haircut (without arousing the barber's suspicion), leaving me too brain-damaged to notice the shortage of hair the next time I look in a mirror? Fortunately this one no longer concerns me.
People who ask me, “Can you do me a favor?” Aside from the problem that no-one can spell “favour”, the fact that they did not tell me what they wanted me to do means that I cannot provide them with a useful answer to the question. Given that my answer to that question is constant (“That depends”), the question is pointless.
People who respond to everything that a person says with “Is it?”, “Did she?”, or “Really?” This one really annoys me – there is reason why the person stated something, so questioning the truth of the statement is pointless unless you know them to be a pathological liar. I like to answer “No” to such questions just to confuse them (the fact that it actually confuses them means that they only expected one answer from the question, making it also pointless).
People who, when given a URL via instant message, always have to ask “what is it?” as though the page at that address is going to reach out of the screen and rip their heart out of their chest and eat it if they are not careful. Have curiosity and the appreciation of surprises and of all things new, wholly died in society?
The enter key
‘PC’ is an acronym for Personal Computer. But ‘Mac’ is an abbreviation for Macintosh. So why do I keep seeing ‘MAC’? What does everyone think it stands for, exactly? Actually, ‘MAC’ stands for ‘Media Access Control’ in computer networking hardware terminology. Maybe people are thinking of MACINTOSH?